How to Handle a Bully Negotiator

bully negotiator

“For much of my career, I have had to deal with very smart business people in giant transactions. Sometimes these transactions have aggressive type A-personality buyers.  They are intimidating and pushy, even bully-like.  How do you deal with these types of people? I admit that I myself have taken this position to get the best deal for myself. With decades of experience negotiating with these types, I’ve found something that I know will help you.

FINDING THE WEAKNESS

When dealing with the hard-nosed buyers or sellers, the “bully” negotiator, know that the more they say that they won’t, the more likely they will. In poker people call this a “tell.”  If your opponent acts big, he is probably weak, and when he gives a weak hand he is most certainly holding a killer hand. Once I realized that aggressive negotiators were telling me something different than what they were actually saying, I started making sales that I had previously missed.

Once I was on a transaction worth millions with a very sophisticated seller. He made it clear to me they did not want to be re-traded on price after the due diligence period and powerfully said, “We will not tolerate a re-trade!”  That was a “tell,” I said to myself. I reassured him that before I ever asked for a lower price I would just bow out of the transaction.  Four weeks later after my due diligence of the company, I called and told him the bad news that I would be withdrawing from the transaction. “As I promised, I will not ask for a lower price”. He then asked how much of a discount would I need to continue on, and we finished the deal.

Think about how many times you’ve told your children, “don’t ask me again,” and minutes later you were doing exactly what you promised you would not do. How about the gambler who tells himself “this is my last bet,” and then makes yet another wager a moment later? You see, when the buyer takes a bully position in the negotiations and they adamantly and emotionally repeat their position, consider this a “tell” as to a weakness.

Have you ever come across a buyer that just about yells at you during the negotiations, sometimes even before the negotiations start? They say words like “absolutely” and “I cannot” go over a dollar amount.  These aggressive type As can be almost overwhelming to the amateur salesperson.

 

Read the full story in last month’s issue of Car Biz Today Magazine.